This post could also be called: He likes it, now we have to pick a ring to put on it
We had been talking about engagment and marriage for a very long time. There was no way I would endure the Long Distance Relationship if I did not forsee marriage in our future. He had proposed over the phone long before we found out when I had off work and booked my ticket. Many girls from a LDR can understand that the intention stated is all that is needed to make it real. I had known in my heart we were getting married from some time and had been “not so secretly” working on wedding plans.
Everyone hopes to have an amazing proposal story. I had read through hundreds of stories and dreamed about different ways Raoul could propose. I had even emailed him a few I really liked. When we talked about it I tried to take the pressure off, telling him I didn’t need all that jazz. I honestly didn’t want him to spend way too much money on a ring or proposal, but I wanted a sweet story to share with my future children. So my son would know how to treat a woman, my daughter would know how she should be treated, and they would know the love their father had for their mother.
I also wanted a special story for those who would feel he may not be “good enough” since I was not getting $3,000 ring. I wanted to prove that showing love is more important than buying love. Just as important as the proposal is “the ring.” Raoul talked to a few of his friends and decided that the money would be better spent on starting off the marriage comfortably and not a piece of jewelry that could always be upgraded. I agreed but mostly because I’m “cheap” and I know I lose everything so wearing anything on my hand that cost more than $50 scared the kitty litter out of me. Selecting the engagment ring was a big battle. I’m going to apologize now for the long post, it was a crazy long process. Raoul had purchased a wedding set minus the center stone. I accidentally saw it on his phone one day and I let it slip that I hated it and didn’t trust his taste. He wanted to see a picture of what I had in mind. This was my first request.
I know it’s so gorg. I was particular too. I wanted pave set stones not channel set and I wanted a rectangular cushion. A young girl at work had the exact one and my eyes were green. Raoul eventually learned to liked it but he fought for princess cut because that’s what looked like the ring he wanted his wife to wear. He had a hard time finding the cushion cut online and in the stores and wanted me to be okay with princess or round. I wasn’t. There was nothing wrong with it, it just wasn’t what I wanted. Those cuts were so popular and I didn’t want my ring to look like everyone else. He managed to convince me the halo was a very popular style and it’s true I didn’t want that. (Go ahead and google: cushion cut halo ring) I also was also starting to get over the white gold look and then came my next obsession.
I fell in love with the colors and with pink being my favorite color it was perfect. I never wanted to wear a diamond because of the conflict diamond thing. I felt even if I had a conflict free diamond I was still supporting the diamond craze. After doing research I wanted either morganite/pink emerald or a colored sapphire. Raoul and I both worried I would change my mind after some years. But I loved it because it looked different than most rings and it wasn’t a diamond.
Then I purchased this “dummy ring” for $40 on Ebay. I wore it to get used to wearing a ring, to ward off unwanted advances and make sure this was the style I really wanted. I liked it but at 3 carats it was way too much bling for me. Everyone thought it was real, it even fooled the women in the jewelry store.
We both searched and searched for rings online for months. We went back and forth about how the guy should choose and I should be surprised and happy with what he gives me. That was his opinion, I’m a very different kind of girl. If I have to wear it for the rest of my life then I want to make sure I liked it. I know I change my mind often but I want what I want. I hate to say it but, I changed my mind again. I stumbled across the stacked ring look and that was it.
I love it because I could change it up. I could incorporate color and not worry about getting tired of it or it clashing. I also didn’t have to worry about the gap between the e-ring and the band. By the time Raoul saw the pictures he was so over rings he said I “had sucked all of the joy out of it”. Trying to salvage what was left of his feelings and make sure I was still getting a proposal I tried to work on a compromise. We decided to switch things around. So he would purchase a wedding band to propose with and get my dream etsy ring later (since it took a few months to be made and he had to save up) He told me to find a ring online and I searched and searched. I preferred etsy because it was unique and handmade, which meant it took longer. Raoul preferred overstock.com which I found to have either cheap or expensive and not much in between. I also search jewelry tv’s website and really liked their selections. But when they failed I turned to Google images. The only ring I liked was more than I wanted to spend on the whole wedding and nothing compared to it.
I just told him to pick whatever and I would be happy. Raoul went ring shopping for a few days and came back fustrated he couldn’t find anything I would like. The women at the store told him if I was being this picky maybe he should reconsider marrying me. He finally gave in (meaning he procrastinated) and said when I get there we will go ring shopping together. We were both burned out but all we could do was wait until I booked a ticket to go visit him.
I learned not to stress out your man too much and that I can be a bit of a diva when I want to get my way. I didn’t exactly get my “dream ring” but I got something so much better, stay tuned to see. Did you have any input in selecting your ring?